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"It is a space for monogamy and heteronormativity. "This is a subreddit that has a limited perspective on what women want, how they work and what their goals and aims are. "The idea is it's geared towards women who are seeking healthy relationships - and that sounds like a positive thing," says Dr van der Nagel.īut she says it's a valid criticism the group is only advancing a specific version of female dating. Other themes that hint at the subreddit's sexually conservative nature include disapproval of consensual BDSM and watching porn.
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"We discuss how to maintain a healthy relationship that benefits you," the bio states. Read more What is Female Dating Strategy?įemale Dating Strategy encourages women to "level-up" and seek a "high-value man" who will treat them like a queen. While it's helped Jenny stop settling for toxic men, FDS's entrenched ideologies mean it's not a safe space for everyone. It treats dating and relationships as a game." "The pick-up artist mindset and goal is really to turn the pursuit of women into a game - assuming it has specific rules and women behave in certain ways that are ripe for exploitation.
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She says the easiest way to understand FDS is to think of it as a reaction to the phenomenon of 'pick-up artistry'. That's a strong subscriber base considering all members are women and Reddit is a male-dominated space, says Dr Emily van der Nagel, a lecturer in social media at Monash University. The female-only forum on social media platform Reddit has 100,000 subscribers and describes itself as a place to discuss effective dating strategies for women. "Being able to connect with other women on the forum helped me understand that I subconsciously seek out guys who are not right for me." "When I first started reading the posts on FDS, I felt very empowered. "I've often believed I have to change, and accept whatever is thrown my way," the 36-year-old says.ĭiscovering the subreddit Female Dating Strategy (FDS) helped her take control of her love life. For a long time, Jenny thought she was to blame for men treating her badly.